middle age (mid′l-āj) n. 1. Spending one year’s disposable income on vinyl figures, only to realize a complete He-Man collection isn’t going to make your current life any better. Beast Man and Cyclops don’t give a fuck about you or your failing marriage. 2. Resolving to die empty and alone. 3. Death showing up at your office door in need of a vacation. 4. Designing goods for Death that inspire consumer-driven fatalities—faulty steering mechanisms, toxic dishwasher detergent inserts that look like jumbo fruit snacks—anything that will help tip people over the edge before Death has to pursue them. 5. Waking to find your house chock-full of the merchandise you created, merchandise designed to kill. Now everything from pouring your cereal to activating your car’s cigarette lighter has become a death trap. Yet as your world falls apart, no matter how hard you try, you can’t seem to fucking die.
Death Metal Epic (Book Two: Goat Song Sacrifce)
Black metal juggernaut Desekration stand poised to record their forthcoming masterwork … once David and Svart get a few more dudes to join the band.
Book Two of The Death Metal Epic finds David Fosberg living his rock and roll fantasy. Which means drinking every day and sleeping on Svart’s couch.
His mom’s couch. Svart lives at home.
David has left Miami behind. Left the Bard behind. And joined forces with Svart, a brutish nekrowarrior who only listens to, like, Celtic Frost, Destruction, and Bathory. The early stuff.
As Desekration start to record Infernö, David’s bandmates rail on about the mystic power of something they call “The Goat Song.” And what they’ll sacrifice to play it.
Life isn’t easy for Eddie Grimboli. Marriage isn’t easy. Winter isn’t easy. Being fat isn’t easy. He can see up his dad’s nightgown. There is strange magic up there. If he stares long enough, he will see his future. This book is a celebration of sloppiness, marriage, grief, love, and being naked.
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Drinking Until Morning
9.95 USD (paper) and 2.99 (digital)
This beer soaked, degenerate coming of age story follows the day-to-day trials in the darkly hysterical world of Grimboli, a chronically unemployed nobody who moves listlessly among a group of young adults from the wrong side of the tracks to an endless litany of pathetic and crazed women, bums, drunks, sordid rooms, dreary embraces, and drunken brawls. Littered with psychic debris, self-loathing, and everything else Grimboli can find to take his mind off his completely unfulfilling life. Newly revised edition with introduction by Gabino Iglesias.
David Fosberg plays guitar in Valhalla. But don’t worry: this is no jukebox hero saga of his rise to fame and fortune.
Valhalla’s a death metal band. From Florida.
And the rest of the guys just quit. There’s not a lot of money in metal hymns to the Elder Gods.
If David can record another album, Plutonic Records will send him on a two week tour to promote it.
Where people like metal.